Hello Friends, you know many people will spend hours learning new ways to grow their business, undergo surgery to look more beautiful, or get new clothes to enhance their image. Yet no one has the ability to be completely objective. It’s simply not possible. Imagine trying to fix your hair and not having a mirror to look at your image. I can almost hear the collective “GASP!” of those poor souls who walk by every window and need to check out how hot they look.
I’m a huge advocate of mirrors. As a clinician, my job is to hold up a mirror to my clients to show them those inner parts that hinder them. However many don’t like this type of mirror check. Many continue to go along thinking that everything is jolly and fine, and when problems arise, they blame the world or others.
It can be easy to fall into this trap when we see others succumb to this lie, and that’s exactly what Satan desires for us to do. However the moment a person blames someone else and externalizes the problem, two things happen:
- An individual chooses to take the stance of a victim
- They are giving away their personal power
So we develop these elaborate defenses to ensure that nothing is our fault. We “put” onto others via projection or blame saying that it’s their fault, not ours. Many times, at the core, the issue is the sin of pride. It’s what caused the most beautiful angel to fall. And it’s the core issue of what has derailed and destroyed countries, companies, families, marriages, and individuals.
The recovery circles have a great way of saying it – they teach to keep your side of the street clean. This means that you’ve done your part. As Christians, we can learn a lot from this. So many people avoid looking at their inner man. The focus remains on the external appearance, and no matter how “attractive” you are there is nothing uglier than a self-absorbed, unkind, entitled heart.
Jesus came to serve. He lived a life that is others-oriented. He showed kindness, mercy, compassion, patience, deference to others, and grace.
Friends, it’s often the little things that make the biggest difference. For instance:
- Being patient at the checkout line at the grocery store
- Saying “May I please” and “Thank you”
- Letting other cars in ahead of you when your driving
- When other cars let you in, waving a hand of “thanks”
- When picking up your child at school, thanking the childcare workers for taking such good care of your babies
- Using your blinker while driving (people can’t read your mind)
- Showing common courtesy, good manners, civility
- Offering to lend a helping hand
- Being aware of others needs
- Listening more, talking less
- Asking “how can I help you?”
- Smile! Smile! Smile! (It’s a free, instant face-lift) 😉
When you put yourself in others shoes and focus on helping them, you will find that your heart will become more loving, giving and more beautiful. Ask the Lord to reveal to you those hidden parts that hold you back, and ask a trusted friend to “hold up a mirror” to what traits might need a little attention.
“Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts. And see if there be any hurtful way in me, lead me to everlasting life.” Psalm 139:23
Growth is a choice – but the rewards are priceless!
Dr. Christy 🙂